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Below are the 18 most recent journal entries recorded in aliviaanderson's InsaneJournal:

    Friday, February 17th, 2012
    4:15 pm
    Wednesday, January 25th, 2012
    10:17 am
    Tuesday, January 17th, 2012
    7:07 pm
    I hate her.  I hate her so much.  And I hate more the fact that I know she probably more than likely hates me too.  And as much as I want her to hate me, and hate her.  I'm scared.  Of being alone.  If she doesn't love me who the fuck is going to love me?  And if she kicks me out...where the fuck am I going to go?  She called me yesterday, high.  I'm pretty sure she was high.  She hasn't gotten high in a while.  Since that time she broke my arm.  Then she stopped.   I don't know why she started again...but thankfully I wasn't there.  But she did say she sold shit from my room.  Probably for the drugs.  I'm pissed.  Obviously.  But its just a matter of time till she gets rid of all of it and rents the room out.  Then I'll have no place to sleep if I go home.  Fantastic.

    FML.
    I need a hug.
    Or a Joke.
    Anyone got a good joke?
    Wednesday, January 11th, 2012
    10:17 am
    So mothers be good to your daughters to...
    The good never win.  The bad always do because they don't follow the rules.  The good always follow the rules.

    My mother never taught me that the good win.  Which I guess is something I should thank her for.  Nice kids always finish last.  And as much as people put on and go 'nah, nice kids dont finish last' or 'nah nice kids are cool'.  They're the first ones you treat like trash.  They're easy to make fun of, because they don't say things back.  They're too nice for that.   But they're always told that it will all even out in the end.  Good win right?  Even if they have to put up with a shit ton of shit before hand.  Being nice makes people think you're weak.  But nice people generally aren't weak, with all the shit they put up with.  Which is probably why I think that I go on that burn book site sometimes.  To try to be nice when people aren't nice.  I think its redic that it always picks on the nice ones.  Chloe.  Because she's nice and sweet and innocent and adorable, and she's trying to be happy.  I'd defend her any day.  I don't think Trip is fat, or was fat.  Some people are just built a little different, I mean shit, his arms are like as big as my face.  Do people really want to mess with that?  I obviously don't know him but I mean I have eyes.  And with everything else that is on there, since I don't know anyone really, all I know is that even if nice kids don't finish first, the one cliche that is pretty true is that karma is a bitch.  If you're shitty to other people EVENTUALLY someone is going to be even shittier to you.

    Which is exactly why I don't trust people.  Another thing my wonderful mother instilled in me.  A lack of faith in the general human population.  I remembered this week why I don't generally talk to people, or I act as annoying as fuck as I can to keep people away.  I like being a perky blonde instead of a drama llama.  I told a secret to someone.  A serious secret.  And I don't know if I trust them to keep it.  I hope they do.  Since its pretty much a life changing secret.  But I don't know if the threat of bodily harm really goes through very well when I'm tiny.  I can fight, I've gotten in a few fights.  But being on the other side of a fist alot, makes me not want to be on the hitting side.  I don't even know why I told you.  Because I was angry?  That is such a lame reason.  Stupid reason.  Because sometimes I am a stupid person.  Plus, I can't tell what kind of person you are.  Sometimes you are nice, and funny, and dorky, and I forget what the fuck we're talking about.  And other times you sound like a douche, no offense.  But then thats a huge chunk of people here, acting nice when they're really douche bags, or douche bags when they're really nice inside.  But life does that huh... life is like that.  You never really know.  I hope that the people I've been nice to here already, really are nice, and not huge douches.  Trying to be nice and then using it.

    I wish I had someone to talk to.  To vent to.  But how do you do that when you don't trust people.  I don't know.  Shit is going on that I can't get my mind off of.  And I can't write it here.  Or I could if it were private.  But still.  I guess we can pretend it doesn't matter as much as it does.  Or maybe it doesn't matter as much as I think it does.  

    I'm going to go build a snowman now.  They kick ass.
    Friday, December 23rd, 2011
    7:58 pm
    If I and life were better.
    ( insert moaning, groaning and bitching here...doubt anyone wants to click and read it )



    Anyway.
    I hope everyone is having a super holiday. Jax, Morty, Trist, I hope you all liked your gifts. Chloe, I had thought I was coming home for christmas and could give you your gift then. But apparently we are in God knows where Georgia for Christmas. So I will give it to you when I get back to school. I'm totes sorry.

    Again have a totes super holiday everyone.

    xoxoxo

    Friday, December 9th, 2011
    8:57 pm
    Thursday, December 8th, 2011
    12:11 am
    That one where truths and lies mingle.
    I wonder sometimes why its so easy to lie.  Sometimes its hard, ya.  To look at someone and lie to their face.  Sometimes its easy.  Like breathing.  Sometimes its just like telling the truth.  And sometimes you lie to yourself so much you don't remember if its the truth or not anymore.

    Vacation was fantastic.  I went home, obviously, and it was pretty warm in Texas.  I liked the warm weather.  Mom was so happy to see me.  I think she missed the few days i was away.  I don't know how she'll stand it in the breaks between Christmas and whenever.  I turned 15 and had a great birthday.  With the orange hostess cupcakes, obviously!  And presents.  I love presents. Mom and Jadon's were probably the best though.  He's such a goof.  So yeah that was a ton of fun!

    Then I spent some of the time at Jadon's house.  OMFG.  His house?  HUGE!  Like probably half the trailer park huge!  I think his bathroom was the size of my entire house...or at least his kitchen was.   Like holy fuck!  Er... I'm trying not to swear for advent.  I mean I know you usually don't give up things for advent.  But I think the baby Jesus needs a gift.  of not swearing.   Like Ricky Bobby, Baby Jesus is my favorite Jesus.   Close behind is the Buddy Christ.  Buddy christ is awesome.  So thanksgiving was amazing.  A ton of food.  I think I don't want to see turkey again for ages!

    Like I totes don't know what to get my secret santa.  I'll have to figure out something Im sure...well OBVIOUSLY I'll have to think of something.  I just don't know what.  I feel bad that I don't have money in this case.  So the person who I have for secret santa, Im totes sorry if your gift isnt as awesome as the gift you woulda gotten from someone else.  But I'll totes try to make it awesome, I promise.

    I also got to meet my brother...well talk to him over AIM.  I hope its okay for me to say that...well call him that.  Apparently he doesn't think I'm the freeloader that I thought he'd think I was.   Even if I'm kinda a sell out.  I want to get to know him, I really do.  I mean we lost like 16 years or something, I mean thats alot to make up for.  And he was real nice about it...which is nice.  I was expecting him to be all WTF! And half expected him to never want anything to do with me...which would have been okay considering we're only siblings cause my mom let his dad not pull out.  But I hear they're spending christmas together, which I guess will be fantastic for me!  It'll be almost like having a real family.  Sweet.

    Okay really I have no idea what else to talk about but this entry most def. had to be better than the last one.  Plus this entry is making me play the same song over and over and its getting stuck in my head.

    I wonder if lying is always bad.  If you do the lying to yourself to make yourself feel better...you aren't really hurting anyone right? 
    Wednesday, November 30th, 2011
    5:17 pm
    Gift Drop Offs. :-p

    Thursday, November 24th, 2011
    10:38 pm
    A birthday Narrative. Backdated to Sunday the 20th

    ooc note: this entry contains talk of abuse, sex, prostitution and contains some violence and swearing.  if these make you uncomfortable please skip. ( Baby I was born this way )

    Thursday, November 17th, 2011
    8:57 pm
    Who wants one for christmas :-p
    So I spent alot of the day crocheting!   So I had to show off!  I know it isn't snowing out yet but

    Monday, November 14th, 2011
    10:22 pm
    The one 'bout whining. Look at me breaking my own rules.



    I love that I JUST looked at the school calender. And realized that we go back home on the 18th. After I JUST got here. It's fantastic. Since I just unpacked, now I have to pack up again and then unpack again. See MORT GIBBS. Knew there was a reason! Gosh.

    Which I guess I should be happy to be going home, cause I mean it is home. But I was looking forward to being around people for my birthday. Not that 15 is a huge number to celebrate. It isn't 13, or 16, or 18. Its just there. Not that my birthday really means like shit anyway, I mean celebrating my mom got knocked up cause she forgot to have the guy slip on a condom. Woohoo. I'm sure she celebrates that all the time too. I can tell. She's probably just as happy to be having me home as I am to be there. But dude, I really wanted cake. Even the fact that the dining hall has cake, even if it isn't 'birthday' cake. Its still freakin cake. I'm sure there will be money still to buy hostess cupcakes though. Hopefully. I don't know what she's been doing with everything while I've been gone.

    Which leads to Thanksgiving. Not that I really expected school to be open on thanksgiving, I don't know what I expected for Thanksgiving. I guess this responsibility lies on myself, since I should have like planned for it and shit. Maybe the food pantry will send us a turkey. But then you always hear how they don't have enough turkeys and stuff every year. So probably not. I probably should have set aside money for it. Or at least something festive...ish. I wonder how much pumpkin pie and turkey pot pie will cost. But then we have to eat the rest of the month too, since I doubt she plans on me coming home either.

    Ung I feel like super stressed out now. I guess I should like call home and tell her and ask her. Wow this entry is like a to do list. And I didn't mean for it to. What the heck. Oh well. I doubt people are going to read it anyway since no one really knows me. But thats cool.

    On the off chance though. [info]oxton WHAT ARE YOU THANKFUL FOR?

    Yarn, Im totes thankful for that!
    Friday, November 11th, 2011
    12:49 pm
    who: Alivia and Noelle
    what: Meeting for a first time
    where: Library
    when: Saturday Morning?
    rating: S for studious

    ( Great Minds...think for themselves )
    12:16 pm
    Dropped off at her room
    To Chloe
    From Alivia

    Happy Birthday sweet pea. Sorry it isn't alot. I didn't have alot of time but I hope you like it. Everyone needs gifts for their birthday. Hope it fits!

    xoxo
    Alivia.

    ( Pressie )
    10:43 am
    Who: Camden and Alivia
    What: Being cute
    where: Some Public Area
    When: Friday early afternoon
    Rating: TC- Since they're both cute it makes it TOTALLY CUTE. lol

    ( I like pepper in my hot chocolate, it makes me feel Spicey. )
    10:33 am
    Who: Jadon and Alivia
    What: Meeting somewhere other than a spam page
    When: Friday Morning
    Where: How about Jadon's room
    Rating: N- for Nerdy

    ( 3.14, Backwards 413. Shabam )
    Sunday, November 6th, 2011
    10:00 pm
    SPAM/LOVE/LOLZ


    SPAM IT-LOVE IT-DON'T STEAL THOSE APPLES
    9:26 pm
    Classes/clubs



    ENG 210- 10th Grade English
    HHD 210- Health and Human Development for Lowers
    MAT 311- Advanced Integrated Mathematics- Enriched
    BIO 360- Biochemistry and Human Nutrition
    PEC 105- Bicycling
    BIO 341- Ecology
    LAT 210- Intermediate Latin


    Upcoming classes:
    BIO 321- Animal Behavior (spring)
    BIO 342- Human Populations and resource consumption Implications for sustainability (winter)



    Clubs:
    Math Discussion Group
    Culinary Society
    E- Protectors
    Student Health Advisory Board
    8:22 pm
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